Mornings

At home, Will loves mornings when I wake him up at 7. I sing to him as I change his diaper and he smiles. We get a bottle and cuddle. Then I lay him in his bouncer and tickle him tummy and we talk until he falls asleep for his morning nap.

In the hospital, mornings start at 4am. He gets a blood draw. We are lucky if they can get it from his iv, but some days (like today) require them to stick a vein in his head. He screams. Then it's time for an X-ray. By this time he is so hungry. Usually X-rays don't bother him but at 430 am it's meal time and his tummy hurts. So he screams.

I hate missing out on our morning routine, which is so special to me.

So I just have to remember how far we have come. How lucky I am to have had 7 weeks at home with him, and many more to come. I look at him now and it feels bittersweet to think of all he has been through; the pain and fear that has saved his life.

I'm glad to be able to remind myself that his life is flooded with joy and good memories.

William Jude, you are loved more than you could ever know.